Thought Leadership: Strengthening Connections Through Restorative Practices

Here at Steward, we remain steadfast in our commitment to building a community of care grounded in civil discourse, individuality, and respect. We strive daily to ensure that students feel seen, heard, valued, and known. One of the ways we are making this a reality is through the intentional incorporation of Restorative Practices in our school culture. All faculty and staff are trained in the use of Restorative Practices with students and adults. Each summer, time is set aside for new employees to be trained by colleagues who have undergone extensive training to become Restorative Practice trainers. There is an additional session offered to new faculty once the year begins as well, to help further strengthen their confidence in implementing these proactive strategies. 

This approach supports our efforts to build community by focusing on strengthening relationships, repairing harm, and prompting accountability in meaningful ways. Restorative Practices are based on an 80/20 rule, in which 80% of strategies/processes are done proactively to build relationships and foster a sense of community. Simply put, they should be done before any wrongdoing takes place.  

Proactive Restorative Practices show up in a variety of ways throughout the school day at Steward. One common way is through circles, which happen in classrooms all the time, particularly during morning and afternoon meetings or during advisory. These are intentional opportunities faculty use to build trust and community in classrooms as students share ideas and reflect on experiences. I’ve observed the impact of circles in the classroom and have enjoyed beginning our Lower School parent coffees with a circle question for parents. Questions range from something as simple as “what food would you eat if you had to eat it the rest of your life?” to “what or who helps you be your best?" or "what is the best thing that happened to you today?” It has been fun to watch parents bond over their shared dreams for their children, as well as laugh over favorite songs to help their children get ready for school in the morning. Those discussions open the door to continued dialogue and often lead to deeper connections as they discover other similarities. 

Restorative conversations are also used to help students talk through conflicts and agree on ways to make it right and reestablish connection. It has been good to witness students come together after participating in a restorative conference after arguing over an intense four-square game during recess or someone not doing their share of the work in a group assignment. After letting go of the initial desire to defend their actions, students are able to express how they were feeling in the moment and acknowledge ways they could have handled things differently and apologize. It has also been encouraging to see students hold each other accountable to agreements made on how to handle out-of-school conflicts that had been interfering with class dynamics. This restorative approach has been powerful in transforming moments of conflict into opportunities for connection.  Rather than focusing on blame or division, all members of the Steward community are able to engage in open dialogue. Through the intentional design of our classroom norms and core values, we foster a culture where every voice is heard and our community is strengthened through empathy and accountability. 

One of the most important goals of school is not only to provide academic instruction but also to ensure that children develop into healthy and competent people. When students feel cared for and connected, they are more likely to make positive choices and take accountability for their actions. Restorative Practices help students reflect on their actions, understand how their choices impact others, and take active steps to repair harm in relationships when necessary. Students learn how to take accountability, improve communication, and demonstrate empathy, and they are better able to solve problems. These skills will serve them well as they leave Steward and enter into their next phase of life. 

At Steward, we believe the partnership between home and school is essential to the overall growth and development of each student. We encourage you to support your child to engage in Restorative Practices at home by using restorative language. For example, asking “what happened?,” “how were others affected?,” and “what could you do to make things right?” when discussing instances of conflict can help students see their role in situations. Using the restorative questions enables individuals to take accountability for their actions and consider how their actions impact others. Through this lens, it is our hope that students will learn that though mistakes happen, they are opportunities to learn and grow. 

Incorporating Restorative Practices at Steward requires an ongoing investment that we remain committed to. As educators, we know that the most meaningful learning happens through connection. Restorative Practices help students learn that they are not defined by their mistakes and that all relationships can be repaired. Each proactive circle and restorative conversation helps build a culture where every person feels connected, capable, cared for, and known.